patience

I have really been working on my patience. I am really noticing a difference in myself over the last couple weeks. I am working on letting things be and to stop trying to control everything. Maybe the week that I spent with my sister really impacted me more than I thought not just in a stressful way but also in a positive way. My sisters life is so out of control that I started noticing what changes that I want to make in my life. There was so much unhappiness in her heart and in her house. It helped me to reflect on my own home and the impact that I am making daily good or bad. Patience is a gift. Patience is wisdom.  
Let God to his work. Forgive yourself for the things you have done wrong and move forward. Be patient in the present but also for the future. 

I have been patient with my sister. She has entered treatment. Praise Him. Life is beautiful.

LCS

10 Miles

10 Miles I ran yesterday. 10 miles on a treadmill!! I must say that I am extremely proud of myself and am now feeling confident about the upcoming race this weekend. If I can do 10 on a stinkin treadmill, I can run 13.1 on the road! YIPEE! I feel great about it. I will say I felt sick a little bit later and almost vomited. But, I did wait way too long to eat something and replenish those calories. Therefore, I learned my lesson. I will need to make sure there is something waiting for me to eat when I finish the race. 

This weekend was another interesting one. Last Friday I was hired to work with the San Antonio News Express. I absolutely loved the hiring manager and we hit it off right off the bat. I thought to myself, this could be it! He assures me that I will make $1, 000 a week! $1,000 a week! Are you freaking kidding me?!? HELL YEAH! But, I knew better. There is a catch. Always. So, I am hanging out with Ron and feeling as though we have known each other forever. I like this guy. This is his father's company, Barton Inc. Which is the Marketing and Sales team for the San Antonio News Express which is a pretty awesome company. They have 15 hubs all in the greatest cities in the country. I am feeling it. Thinking to myself, you have to start at the bottom and work your way up. I can sling a few papers....no big deal. 

So, I go to the HEB with a training manager to see how hard this can be. Gabby is  a short Hispanic woman about 5 foot. She talks super fast and has a very thick accent. So thick that you have to concentrate very hard to even understand what she is saying. Gabby is the top sales manager and earns anywhere from $1200 to $1500 a week selling papers. I am thinking to myself, ok, pay attention because you can do this. It's just selling papers, right?

Selling papers? More like hustling! I spent 3 hours with Gabby and we sold a whopping 2 newspapers while I was there! 2!! Duos! A pair! Two! Really??? NO one wants the paper! They already have the paper! IF they don't it's because they do not want it. The area we were in was a wealthier area and so most everyone who walked in the store already have the paper and the younger ones don't read the paper. Here I am with Senorita Gabby slinging papers. Seriously, she was so aggressive and waving her hands to get people over and asking them their zip code and information before they even knew what the hell she was saying! OMG it was quite the entertainment for a Saturday afternoon. I felt like I was bugging people. I did make one sale on my own but really two papers in 3 hours is not going to bring in the cash money. 

Long story short (cause really there are plenty of things to say about that afternoon) I called Ron immediately pulling out of the HEB parking lot and resigned. After 3 hours. Done. Finished. No way in hell. I called him and explained to him that the real reason I took this job was because I liked him, his father and the company but that there is just no way that I can take such a huge gamble. Fingers crossed that I am going to sell papers. I let him know that this girl needs a base salary and steady income. He tried to keep me, really he did. But he understood and told me that if I change my mind at any time to call him, I will have a job. Well, that's nice and all but I want a salary job!!! End of story. I am back at square one.

Wednesday is the job fair. Please God, help me. We are so poor. I WILL be going to the WIC office this week. I do pray everyday, I thank God everyday for our blessings....I do. We are blessed but we need mooola!

Job search fail. 10 miler...success! Back on the hunt. Well, I may not have a job but this girl can run 10 miles! Most importantly, has this crazy little family.

Oldies but goodies. 

9 days til race

It's nine days til the big race! My first half marathon that I will be running with two of my absolute favorite people in the world! We are all first timers and haven't trained much but will finish and be proud of ourselves! I am so looking forward to some girl time and bonding memories. 

I am thankful for this quiet evening alone. Hubs is off playing music and the girls were tucked in at 8 o'clock sharp. It's nights like these that I truly love. Quiet. We all need a little bit of breathing time to sit, reflect, and just be. I think I may need it more than others. This is dreamy.


I was back out job searching today. Hired for the San Antonio Express News today! YAY, Me! Not sure what will come out of it all. Loved the hiring manager! But not sure if this will be the job for me. I will go out tomorrow and explore the possibilities. That's all you can do. Stay in the game, do your best, put your best foot forward. It will all work out. I look forward to blogging about my experience tomorrow.

Not much to say tonight. Wanting to soak up every ounce of alone time and watch a girlie movie. Just sounds great so I will. lcs

Excellent 8

Today was a wonderful day. I was able to hang out with my favorite friend, Ariel. A woman who never seems to not amaze me! I am so blessed. Truly blessed. Friends are there for you through your rants and raves, joys and sorrows. I wouldn't have a clue what I would do without her amazing friendship. Period. Ariel, this is a shout out to you....your are an inspiration to me and I look up to you and admire you. I will forever be thankful for you.

A day filled with friends, long workouts, and now a quiet house.

Last night, Britt and I did an Aqua Boot Camp class. I will just say it was hilarious because I would have never in a million years think that I would do a class like that with my husband!! Ever. And he thoroughly enjoyed it! He even got a compliment from the teacher saying that she "loved to watch him swim." HA! I am so sure you did lady! Considering that we were by far the youngest people in the entire pool! We definitely stuck out but we laughed and worked hard. I will say this....I feel in love with my husband all over again in that pool last night. Just watching him taking Aqua Boot Camp to a serious level.  We enjoyed every minute until the lady in Child Care came and got us because we took too long! Game over. Good times had by all (especially, the instructor)!

 

Back in it

So many events have happened since my last blog entry. 

1. Our computer overheated and was impossible to keep on.

2. Christmas came and went

3. My sister had her baby two weeks early and was born with Severe Meconium Aspiration and pneumonia. She may not live.

4. I immediately flew to Florida to support my sister through a very difficult time in her life.

5. Expressed my deep concern and empathy to my sister for the 10 days that I was present. She too is not well.

6. My best friend calls, his mother has passed away from a freak "choking on a cough drop" incident. Literally.

7. Drove 8 1/2 hours up to Georgia to show my love and support to one of my favorite families in the whole wide world.

8. Came home and almost immediately caught the flu that my beautiful daughters decided to infect me with.

9. I am now alive and well.

10. I am starting over.

It may not seem like that much has gone on to some people, but to me, for the last three weeks the world has been upside down. 

There is a place for everyone in a family. Lately, I am the one holding everyone's head above water. 

Truth is, my sister has a severe alcohol and drug problem. She has been through detox twice, been divorced, has a new beau (who is super lame), who now has a baby with the super lame-o, is broke because she cannot seem to know what happens to the $4200 she gets a month in child support!!, and literally if she doesn't get her life together I fear for her life. She is not well, her world is not well she is my sister. My best friend in the whole wide world.  If that is not a hard pill to swallow (no pun intended) , I don't know what is.

I love my sister. Very very much. Maybe more than anyone else, period.

Ok, that's going on and then my best friends mom dies. While sucking a cough drop. Chokes. Is brain dead. I have to say good-bye. I love Liz and miss her but will always remember her...she flippin' ROCKS!

Then, kicker. After the weekend of the funeral. I am hanging with the family at the dinner table when all of a sudden we are laughing and jokin around (as usual) and my Uncle starts choking....he runs out of the kitchen onto our deck to keep from coughing on his family and their food. I watch him take two strides and he collapses, nails his head on our deck railing and has passed out. I almost lost my Uncle from choking. 

Same night of the choking incident. I cried my eyes out. Asked God lots of questions. Mainly,"why?". Hugged my Uncle, my mother, my sister and thanked God for all he has done for us so far in this life.

Lessons learned:

• Don't wait, jump on a plane. Even if you can't afford it. You can't afford to miss moments, even the ones that seem to be a nightmare. 
• Be there. Through it all.
• Hug the ones you love every second you can.
• Don't let another be judged. 
• Be honest, forgiving and try to understand.
• Don't suck on cough drops.
• Love. Unconditionally.   

 

This video my Uncle put together...just seems fitting. I love my family.